How To Keep The Spark Alive – Lesson 5.5 – Spicing Up Your Sex Life

Welcome to Lesson #29 of the How To Keep The Spark Alive course!

You’ve just explored the difference between sexuality and sensuality. You’ve also learned about a few actions that turn men and women on. Now it’s time to explore fun things to do in your sex life.

People Are Different

In this course, you’ve learned much about differences, from communication styles, to social needs, to sexual drive. People are also different in their comfort level in exploring techniques in making love.

As unfair as it may seem to the one who is the more adventurous in sexual experimentation, the less adventurous of you gets to limit the experimentation. Pushing someone beyond their sexual comfort zone can violate the respect and trust you have for each other.

On the other hand, taking a few risks in going outside your comfort zone can be exciting and rewarding. If you’re just a little uncomfortable with trying something new, give it a try. You may find it great fun.

Get Rid Of The Routine

Remember how exciting sex with each other first was? You explored each other’s bodies, laughed, and had a great time.

As relationships get older, the tendency is to get in a routine in all areas of your life. Routine is a time saver, but it can also get dull and decrease your passion.

Is it time to mix things up?

Think back the last few times you made love. How long did you spend from foreplay to finish? Do you do the same things, in the same way, over the same amount of time?

Perhaps all you need to do is slow things down.

Or, try some of these ideas:

Some of these techniques are more than a thousand years old, when making love was considered a spiritual and sacred act.

1. Begin by looking into each other’s eyes and placing your hand on the other’s heart.
   • The ancient practice of Tantra teaches this. You are connecting with each other on an emotional and spiritual level.
   • You’re bringing your full attention to your partner. There is nothing sexier than focusing only on your partner and your love for them.
2. Set a timer for 20 minutes. You can hug, kiss, touch, cuddle, and tease for 20 minutes. You’ll learn about each other, what you like, and have a great time with foreplay.
3. Bring a deck of cards to bed. Assign a type of foreplay to each one of the suits. You can use massage, kissing, and more. Mix things up and enjoy laughing.
4. Truth or Dare. Here’s an opportunity to ask your partner to do what you’d like them to do in a fun game. If you haven’t had the courage to ask yet, you can with this game. And there’s an app for that!

These are just a few ways you can spice up your sex life. Don’t be embarrassed to use the Internet to find ideas of how to take the routine out of your sex life.

Remember Communication

Trying new techniques and positions with something as private as sex can bring up unexpected feelings. Most of these difficult feelings have to do with the past. This is especially true if either of you were sexually abused or had sexual experiences you were afraid of. Feelings of shame and anger could surface.

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