Is It Time To Pivot And Make A Life Change?

Introduction

“Our dilemma is that we hate change and love it at the same time; what we really want is for things to remain the same but get better.” (Sydney J. Harris)

Throughout your life, you will encounter many phases, many people, many jobs, and many changes.

Those changes either come from within, or when somebody else makes a decision that causes us to make a decision about how we will or will not adjust.

More often than not, in those situations, we often feel that we don’t have a choice:

• You get a job offer from a company in a new city, so you must move.
• Your child is struggling in school, so you need to spend more time working with them on their studies.
• You come to terms with the problems in your marriage, and you have no choice but to put an end to it.

In each of these situations, you may feel you have little choice.

But, as we will discover, we do make the decision to “pivot” (which is modern-speak for changing your life’s direction) – either we take the job, or we decide we don’t want to uproot the family, so we keep up the job hunt.

You’re here because you’re ready for a change, but you’re not quite sure how to commit to a new life.

“Pivot” shouldn’t be a scary word, and change shouldn’t be a foreign concept.

Why?

Because it’s in our nature to change regularly – we just don’t realize it.

So, if you’re contemplating a significant change in your life or you just made one, you’re in the right place.

We all have varying levels of comfort with change, and most of us are pretty reluctant to embrace it.

If that sounds like you, then don’t worry – it’s totally understandable.

Change isn’t something that can be taught. It’s person-dependent, and pivoting your life really is just a by-product of all the events and things leading up to that point.

But, and it can be a big but, it’s easier said than done, and it’s fair to say that you may be cringing at the thought of changing up your current lifestyle.

In this guide, I’ll open your eyes to the concept of change:

• I won’t change your mind or teach you – I’ll simply give you a different perspective.
• I’ll tell you why it’s hard and why people struggle with it, and I’ll counter that with the multitude of benefits that come along with a life pivot.
• Then I’ll get to the good stuff, including when you should make a change, and how to make a change.

So, buckle up and get ready for a new perspective – changing times are upon us!

What Is Change?

Change is an idea that either scares you or thrills you.

But whether you thrive in new situations or you try to avoid them at all costs, you must try to get comfortable with the concept of change – because it’s not going away any time soon.

Better yet, you should get to a point where you understand how to change your life gracefully and strategically.

By definition, change means the act or instance of making or becoming different.

If you’re thinking, “That seems pretty hard to define,” you’re right.

By its very nature, change is hard to characterize because change is always changing.

That’s mind-blowing, right?

And this is exactly why so many people fear change – it’s the unknown, and most humans aren’t comfortable with the unknown.

In the context of your life, change is broken down into different stages – it isn’t instantaneous, nor is it experienced the same way for every person, so to understand what it means to you, let’s look at the five stages of experiencing change:

1. Precontemplation – In the first stage of changing or pivoting your life, you’re in denial. You don’t think you need to make a change, or you’re not really prepared to make one yet.
2. Contemplation – This stage is when you decide something needs to change. You may not necessarily be ready for the change, but you know something needs to be different. More times than not, the contemplation stage is when you realize you will need to take on this challenge on your own.
3. Preparation – At this point, you’ve not only acknowledged that you want to make a change, but you’ve also decided that you will. You may not yet have a game plan for how you will make these changes, but you are committed to the pivot.
4. Action – This is the exciting stage when you’re starting to put things into high gear. You’re making changes and taking action to ensure that your life is pivoting. You’re on the path to success!
5. Maintenance – This stage is often underappreciated, but it’s critical to the success of your new lifestyle. In order to keep things afloat, you need to keep up with the changes you’ve implemented in your life. You may experience some setbacks, and that’s okay. The important thing is that you keep tracking with your goals and the changes you’ve implemented in your life.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by looking at these stages, don’t worry – everything has a process in life, and change is no different.

Making a pivot in your life doesn’t mean you need to follow a strict process.

The stages above are simply listed so that you understand that you shouldn’t expect a significant life pivot to happen immediately.

You’ll be able to relate to these steps and better understand what your mind is going through as you pivot your life.

Why Do We Struggle With It?

Think about the quote, “Change is the only constant.”

It sounds like an oxymoron, right? After all, if change is the only constant, doesn’t that mean that nothing is consistent?

If you’re thinking this way, you’re on the right track.

Change is omnipresent – everything and everybody is always changing.

We can’t keep track of changes, which makes us nervous because it means we’re consistently operating within the unknown.

I’ll let you in on a secret (that you probably already know): humans don’t like the unknown.

In addition to that, here are a few other reasons why we struggle with change:

1. It’s Risky

Let’s face it – when we change something up, we don’t know what to expect – the outcome could either be better than our starting point or worse.

And that’s a big risk!

Think about people who change their hairstyles all the time. They’re taking a risk that they may not love their new ‘do, but on the flip side, there’s a good chance they’ll find the perfect look by testing out something different.

The risk element can be scary, but we shouldn’t view it as an obstacle – just something that we can work on.

2. We Lack Purpose

It’s one thing to make a change, but it’s another to have a purposeful quest towards a life pivot.

If you set out to make a change, that’s exactly what you’ll do – but there’s no guarantee that you’ll maintain or enjoy it.

On the other hand, if you start with a “why”, your change will have purpose and strategy – which, in the long run, leads to adherence and commitment.

3. The Changes Are Unrealistic

A classic example is New Year’s Resolutions. The first week of January, the gyms are crowded, people are significantly more friendly, and everybody is on their A-game at work.

But after a few short weeks, everything is back to normal.

In this case (and many other cases), people have a hard time implementing changes because they’re setting up unrealistic expectations for themselves.

If you want your life changes to stick, keep them realistic, measurable, and purposeful.

Humans like stability. In fact, we crave it.

The reason we struggle with change is that it’s a neurological imperative to be kept safe – our primal brain is wired to crave safety and security to help us survive.

When we start to step out of our comfort zone, we hear a little voice in our head telling us it’s too risky. We can’t do it. What if we fail?

So, as you begin to make changes, even small ones, expect and accept that there will be self-doubt and fear come up, because it’s just your brain trying to keep you safe.

No matter how open to risk you are or how much you crave spontaneity, you – like everybody else – feel most comfortable with stability.

Before you start trying to prove that you’re not in favour of a stable life, let’s look at a few examples that show just how extreme this principle goes. In other words, it encompasses everybody and every situation.

• Example 1: Sandra is a freelance graphic designer. She loves what she does, and she grew up with the notion that passion was more important than pay. Things change when she begins to really struggle with money. She has to pick up a second job, rarely sees her family, and is always stressed out.

  Sandra would’ve never envisioned herself saying this before, but she decides she wants to pursue a more stable career path. She decides that she can always do graphic design in her spare time but that a steady paycheck sounds like the best option for her. She made a change that would have scared her just months ago, but after a series of life events, she decided it was best, and she pivoted her life for the better.

• Example 2: Josh doesn’t like to exercise. It has never been a big part of his life, and he gets bored as soon as he hops on the treadmill. There’s a part of him that is nervous about exercising. It’s intimidating to work out around other people who are experienced and comfortable with working out. For him, stability means sitting at home and watching his favourite TV show with his wife.

  After a check-up with the doctor, Josh realizes he needs to adopt a more active lifestyle. This wasn’t in the cards for him a few months ago, but his doctor’s visit catalyzes a shift. He knows that he’ll feel a little unstable or uncomfortable at first, but he also knows that it’s best for him – and his mindset shifts accordingly.

• Example 3: Artie works at a grocery store, and he loves his job. He’s friends with all his coworkers, he gets discounts on food, and he was just recently named employee of the month. For him, it’s stable, and it’s dependable. He has never thought about changing his job or moving to a new city because he knows there’s no guarantee that he would like it.

  One day, everything changes. He walks into work and decides he wants to do something else and experience a new environment. He doesn’t know where he will go or what he will do, but this change of mind is compelling enough to encourage him to do it quickly. Artie realizes that stability, although nice, is never a guarantee. He could lose his job tomorrow and would still be faced with uncertainties. He’s now ready to take on a new environment and a new challenge.

All these examples are pretty different from each other. One of them may resonate with you – or maybe none of them do!

The vital thing to note with each of these examples is that life is never a guarantee. Stability and certainty are nice-to-haves, but they are not a rite of passage.

As humans, we have to embrace that change will happen, and sometimes, we need to catalyze that change.

The next time you struggle with change, remind yourself that it is 100% normal. And remember that it’s just your brain’s way of keeping you alive, so the species survives – in order to continue progressing and evolving, we need to be able to not only embrace change but enact it.

Now that you know what change really is, how change pertains to you, and why we, as humans, struggle with it, it’s time to talk about the positives:

• Why is transformation necessary?
• What benefits does it have on your life?
• How will it affect you in a positive way?

I’ll answer all those questions and more.

Why Is Change Important?

If you’re reading this with a “What’s in it for me?” attitude, you are not alone.

We rarely associate change with positivity, but you probably do associate change with impact.

Think about it logically – if things remain the same, there is no impact.

Envision a diagram with a straight horizontal line. That is life without change. Sure, you may minimize the risks, but you also minimize the successes.

With that in mind, here are some reasons why change is important and impactful.

1. Personal Growth

Just like flowers need water to grow, you need change to grow.

With change comes learning and personal growth opportunities that will challenge you as a person for the better – you’ll be pushed out of your comfort zone in the best way possible.

2. Confidence

Do you know that feeling you get when you overcome an obstacle, and you are over-the-moon happy with yourself?

That’s a healthy dose of confidence that you will get when you pivot your life – you’ll be able to look back on all the challenges you overcame and the great things you did, and you’ll celebrate.

And that confidence is priceless, and it’s inevitable with life pivots and transitions – especially when you tackle it all on your own.

3. Motivation

Motivation is contagious – it starts with one small win, and soon enough, you can’t get enough of it.

In the context of changes in life, motivation will come much easier to you because you will know what you’re looking for. You’ll have more aim, and you’ll be so much more excited about potential pivots in your life.

If it starts with a big one, then lucky for you, you’re already halfway there!

4. Resilience

Resilience is a big deal, and for many, it’s highly underrated.

Being resilient means you won’t back down or give up when life gets hard – and as you know, life isn’t always easy.

Being able to weather the storms that change brings, you’ll naturally become stronger.

5. Excitement

We’ve talked about the harsh aspects of change or pivots in life, but there’s a whole world of confusion that exists in the realm of transitions.

Making changes in your life is exhilarating – there are new people to meet, new places to go, healthy habits to develop, and things to learn about yourself.

6. Opens The Right Doors (And Closes The Wrong Ones)

More often than not, you decide to make a change because something isn’t going the way you want it to.

In a way, you’re trying to close a door that doesn’t seem like the right one for you.

When you embrace change, you commit yourself to closing all the wrong doors until you finally open the right one.

I obviously can’t guarantee that it’ll happen on the first try, but rest assured, you will definitely be able to move on in your life when you’re committed to making changes.

7. Gives You A Story

Have you ever been asked, “What’s your story?” and had a hard time answering it?

That may be because you’ve hit a stopping point, and you are no longer a fan of your story.

But your story is uniquely yours and it should be exciting, happy, and you.

The decision to pivot your life is a chance to rewrite your story. You’re in the driver’s seat here, so when you get nervous about taking a chance and mixing things up, remember that you are the writer of your own story.

8. Flexibility

Like an athlete who stretches every day, your mental bandwidth will stretch as you put yourself up to the challenge of tackling new changes. You’ll become more adaptable because you will recognize that change is constant, and life is fluid.

We can’t just hope that things will always be the same and that things will always be comfortable.

Instead, we’ll learn how to be flexible when things take an unexpected turn, which will help you at work, in relationships, and on a personal level.

9. Learn Your Strengths

In addition to becoming more confident, you’ll also learn a lot more about your strengths and weaknesses.

Pivoting your life takes a tremendous amount of introspection, and in those periods of self-reflection and learning, you’ll realize your strengths on a new level.

10. Compassion

Any time you get sucked into a routine, you become wrapped up in your own bubble – you may forget what’s going on in the world or what it’s like to go through a hardship.

This lack of compassion often goes hand in hand with a mundane, routine lifestyle.

Making a change does the opposite – it gives you an appreciation for challenges and triumphs, and it reconnects you to the human experience, including the good, the bad, and the ugly.

In the long run, this compassion will help you and those around you.

When Is It Time To Change?

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