Introspection And The Power Of Becoming Self-Aware – Lesson 4 – The Process Of Observing
Introduction
Welcome to Lesson 4 in my Introspection And The Power Of Becoming Self-Aware course!
Introspection is the process that encourages you to examine your inner self in order to gain self-awareness. We tend to talk about this in terms of process – we process our inner life through introspection.
There is a more formal process that was once used in psychology as an experimental technique and it is incredibly similar to how we handle self-introspection, the difference being the psychological technique is more rigorous and structured.
The informal reflection process is a practice where you examine your emotions, feelings, memories, thoughts, and what you do in your life, and try to figure out what they all mean.
How does that square up against a research technique?
Interestingly, it’s a self-observation process. Wilhelm Wundt, the psychologist who developed the research technique, trained people to objectively and carefully analyze their thoughts.
There is a suggestion that this is not the most accurate reading of the method he used.
When we talk about introspection, we typically think about a bit of soul-searching as we prop ourselves up in bed or on the couch.
Wundt, on the other hand, used a rigid technique and in a highly controlled environment.
As far as research techniques, introspection has fallen by the wayside. However, that doesn’t mean it’s not an effective tool for you to use at home.
If you want to engage in self-analysis and learn more about yourself then introspection is a good tool. It’s a fantastic source of knowledge that is all about you, and provided you do it right, you will gain self-awareness.
You will make connections between the experiences you have been through and your responses and reactions as a result. You will be able to identify behaviours, beliefs, dysfunction, and your own mindsets that may be driving what you do, think and feel.
Let’s look at the process of observing that is a key part of the introspection journey.
Observing
In order to make any type of change or solve any problem, you must first identify the problem and what needs to be changed. Observing yourself and what you do, feel, how you react etc. is the starting point.
What follows are some of the most powerful areas of your life to observe that are often hot spots for issues.
Looking closely in these areas can give you great insight in identifying things you do, which is useful for finding issues to work on, or to simply gain a deeper level of self-awareness on the introspection highway.
Your Relationships
Your relationships offer a huge wealth of insight into who you are and what you do.
In particular, it is our romantic relationships that are mirrors of our deepest inner selves.
We tend to attract that which fulfills our deepest core beliefs and attitudes – therefore, you can learn a lot by considering what you do, how you feel, and how you act and react within your romantic relationships.
- Are you controlling?
- Are you too jealous?
- Do you attract abusive partners?
- Do you easily forgive and forget trespasses that are serious indiscretions?
- Do you feel loved and supported?
- Do you get along?
- Do you get used for money or your body?
- Do you not know how to set boundaries with others?
- Do you put yourself ahead or behind others? Are you less important than others?
- Do you trust others?
- How do you act and react in these relationships?
- What conflicts are there?
- What do you wish was different?
- What is lacking? What could you live without?
- What problems are there?
The list can go on and on of observations that you can make about yourself within the scope of your relationships, and these observations will give you the insight you need to identify issues that you need to work on.
How You React To Heartbreak And Painful Situations
The ways in which you deal with your emotions can offer a lot of insight in observing yourself in action.
There are healthy and unhealthy ways to deal with negative feelings, and often observing what you do can offer you great perspective.
For example, if you tend to get drunk whenever you are in pain, this is a big red flag that you have issues dealing with feelings.
How You Communicate With Others
How you communicate offers a vast variety of opportunities to observe what you do to identify issues to work on.
For example, if you are an assertive person, this indicates that you’re confident, have healthy self-esteem, and know how to take care of yourself.
Conversely, if people walk all over you, this tells you that you likely have poor self-esteem, lack confidence, and have some work to do.
How You Take Care Of Yourself
Another hot area to observe where you can identify “what you do” is self-care:
- Do you like yourself?
- Do you love yourself?
- Do you take good care of yourself?
- Is your inner voice supportive and kind?
General
- Is your life the way you want it? If not, what is it that you are not doing, or doing, to make it so?
- What areas of your life have issues?
- What is missing?
- Where and in what situations do you say, “I can’t believe this happened again.”
- Where are the problems?
- Where is conflict?
- Where is unhappiness?
It all begins with self-awareness, when you identify “what you do” you can then go on to the “whys” and the healing.
Examples Of Observations
Let’s walk through some examples to get you started.
These are common situations we find ourselves in and where introspection could provide us with insight into how best to deal with it.
Observation One
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