My Thoughts On, And Experience With, Nudity

Before I start, let me warn in advance you that this article will be discussing nudity, and, specifically, my experience with it.

So, A Bit Of Background

I have never, as far back as I can remember, liked wearing any more clothes than absolutely necessary.

Growing up in England, the thought of not wearing anything at all was rarely an issue because it was so cold (and damp) most of the time.

The summers did seem to get warmer as the years went by, the exception being 1976, when there was the worst heat wave for many years.

After getting married and moving down from the north west to the midlands, I once or twice started wearing fewer clothes – but never anything less than underpants and shorts.

I once did briefly raise the subject of going naked with my first wife, to a naturist resort, but she was pretty much aghast at the idea. (She’d had a somewhat sheltered upbringing, in more ways than one, and far more sheltered than I’d had.)

The subject was never raised again, but once, when I was on holiday in Morocco, probably in late 2003, I decided to go for a massage in the hotel spa.

I asked the lady should I remove all of my clothes, or everything but my swimming trunks, and she said that was entirely up to me.

For reasons I’m still not sure about, I decided to take everything off.

My biggest concern, and one that I’m sure applies to many men, was getting an unwanted erection, and quite frankly, I’m surprised that worry alone didn’t cause me to leave my trunks on.

But no – I was standing there, with nothing on, in front of a Moroccan masseuse.

The first part of the process was to go for a shower, by myself, but after that, when the massage started properly, I was lying there on the table, letting her touch my naked body.

The above choice of words is not intended to suggest this was a sexual experience – sensual, maybe, to a degree – but my only thought was, “don’t get an erection, don’t get an erection”.

The massage, which was 100% professional and above board (e.g. no “happy endings”), eventually finished, without “incident”, and that was the end of that.

I actually went for another massage, near the end of that holiday – a different type this time – and I opted to leave my trunks on.

Again, I’m not sure why – I’d already managed one massage with no clothes on. Maybe I thought twice would be pushing my luck?

Back home, I never thought about it again, even though I still had this deep-seated desire to try visiting a naturist resort.

But there was no point mentioning it, because my wife at the time would have been dead set against it.

Fast forward to 2005, which is when I got to really know the lady who would be my second wife.

We talked for hours – anywhere from four to twelve hours each day, seven days a week – over the Internet, and over the course of many months, we discussed pretty much every possible subject there was.

And one of those was nudity.

I used to sleep naked in those days, and had done for over 20 years, which sort of shocked my lady friend. She even asked me to start wearing underpants, in preparation for when I moved out to the USA to be with her.

That immediately told me that nudity at home (or anywhere else) with her was going to be a no-no.

In fact, I’d often wondered, when watching American shows and movies, why people who had clearly had sex in bed still got up with their clothes (or, at least, underwear) on. Unless you’re talking about an opportunistic quickie, the thought of making love with any clothes on at all, particularly in bed, is just bizarre.

It turns out that the USA’s puritanical foundation is still very much there – and not just with religious people, because my second wife was very much an atheist, like me.

She didn’t even like me wearing, in public, a thin shirt that allowed the outlines of my nipples to show through, which I found really odd.

There was one day, in one of my first summers here and I wasn’t as acclimatized as I am these days, when it was even hotter than usual – probably over 100 degrees – and she let me take my t-shirt off.

It was obvious she was uncomfortable with that, and sure enough, within an hour, she found an excuse that sort of forced me to put it back on again.

My Experience Of Nudity

Let’s move forward to 2019 – the first summer after she died.

It was super hot, as is often the case here, and I’d been on a four-hour Skype call with a friend (and former colleague) back in England, and even though this was in the early hours of the morning (because of the seven-hour time difference), I was drenched in sweat after we hung up.

I hadn’t felt that hot, but being on the phone has often made me perspire, for some reason.

I decided then and there to not wear a shirt in the house, mainly to keep me cooler and because wearing damp clothes is even more uncomfortable than wearing dry ones.

But then, a few days later, I decided to remove my shorts too – only leaving my underpants on, unless I had to go outside to meet one of my mail delivery people, who might not have appreciated my going out there naked. (Personally, it wouldn’t bother me at all if others saw me with no clothes on.)

The big breakthrough came a few days after that, when I thought, “Why not just go naked around the house?“

Well, the obvious answer to that was my three doggies – having no clothes on with three dogs does require a degree of caution.

But the moment I removed everything, it felt so right.

The thing is, I stopped thinking of the human body as anything objectively sexual some time ago, and let’s face it, by objective standards, there is not very much physically attractive about my body.

It’s not like I’m ugly (I think) – but I’m no Adonis either. I’m “average” looking and probably overweight by a good 10 – 20 pounds.

But since nobody else would see me naked, who the hell cares?

I would even venture into the back yard with no clothes on, during the daytime but that’s mainly because I have no close neighbours and the 20 acres I live on is pretty remote so I’m not really overlooked from most directions. (At night, I’m happy to be less cautious because it’s close to pitch black out here – there are no street lights, or anything else like that.)

Still, I don’t know who lives nearby, or what their views are, and since I didn’t want them calling the police on me, I decided to play it carefully.

Other than being careful around the dogs, it did make me more aware of a few other things that I never noticed before.

For example:

• Caution while handling hot things, or cooking in general, is obviously required.
• Small things, such as letting the fridge door swing shut on my body, which when you’re wearing clothes you don’t even think about, but with nothing on, you realize just how cold it is.
• I began noticing just how much water I was splashing around when washing the dishes in the kitchen sink.
• Just being aware of what’s where, since you’re more exposed.

By the time summer was coming to an end, I began to feel sad at the thought of having to wear clothes again – but there’s no way I’d remain nude all winter because it does get really cold here. (This is one reason why I would still like to move – to somewhere that’s warm enough all year round to be naked.)

As I write this, in early June, I’ve been back on my naked protocol again for a few weeks, and I really love it, because it feels so free and liberating.

To be honest, even clothes you would usually classify as comfy feel uncomfortable – because I simply don’t like wearing them.

Part of this is also to do with Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD), which can, for me (because it affects different people differently), cause extreme discomfort and even pain, especially with the sort of continual pressure you get from clothes, even if that pressure is light.

I can’t help thinking what my wife would say, but it’s irrelevant as she’s not here any longer.

Would I try a naturist resort (like this one in the south of France a couple of my friends stay in during summer)?

I would still have my concerns about unwanted erections (not that I get any at home), but other than that, I’m pretty sure it would feel like home to me.

General Thoughts On Nudity

In general, I find humans’ attitudes to nudity weird – in the same way that sex is treated as something dirty (which I talk about here).

The human body is nothing to be ashamed of, but cultural programming tells us otherwise.

I don’t get why so many people are freaked out by mothers breastfeeding their children, and yet ignore the overtly sexual advertising that is all around us.

I find it sad that the naked body is primarily associated with pornography and sex.

For example, without cultural indoctrination, would men grow up finding women’s breasts obsessively attractive? Is there some evolutionary heritage that suggests women with larger breasts make better mothers (and therefore create stronger offspring, more capable of surviving), or are we simply taught, directly or indirectly, that boobs are, as the coarse colloquialism goes, “fun bags”?

I think parents should encourage their children, from as early an age as possible, to be comfortable with nudity – their own and that of others – at least until they start to feel weird when they reach puberty. (But even then, I’m not convinced it need be the issue some think it is.)

What Next?

Well, this has been a longish and highly personal article, but there is a broader point here.

For example, there are health benefits from sleeping in the nude, which is a safe place to start if you’re not yet ready for walking around the house naked.

And if you want to take it further, try wandering about without clothes on after a bath or shower for longer than usual – especially if you’re alone in the house. Even before I was consciously experimenting with nudity, I always preferred to air off au naturel rather than dry myself down with a towel.

Next, if you want to take it to the next level, try being naked around the house for an hour or more – all day if you want and circumstances permit this.

Or dance to music with nothing on? Yes, things might swing about a bit, but so what?

Then, if you have a garden or backyard that is not overlooked, why not try being outside for a while with no clothes on?

They reckon that, depending on where you live, 20 minutes of whole-body exposure to the sun each day is highly beneficial, not least because sunlight is the best natural source of vitamin D, something that many people are deficient in.

Sunbathing naked is the obvious and most popular choice here, as you can see from this photo of one of my friends in the French nudist resort I mentioned above:

And for those who enjoy gardening, the first Saturday in May is celebrated as World Naked Gardening Day! 🙂

Also, try to think about why you might have an aversion to nudity.

Is there a good reason for it, or is it simply behaviour you were programmed with as a child?

I know this may upset some people, but I think religion (e.g. “the fall of man”) bears some of the responsibility for why naked bodies are frowned upon.

If you are embarrassed by your own body, again, why?

It’s your body, and even if you’re overweight or you have birthmarks or scars, this is part of who you are.

The fact that different cultures are attracted by different body shapes shows that this is all cultural.

I knew from the moment my second wife sent me photos of her dogs that she was likely overweight – because one of those photos happened to show her ankles, which were significantly wider than normal, and that is often a clue that the person is on the larger side.

And as I’m sure I’ve mentioned elsewhere, we agreed in about March of that year that I would go out to be with her as soon as it was practical, which didn’t happen until October – but I didn’t even see a photo of her face until September, because what she looked like was irrelevant. (This was one of the big advantages, to me, of having a long-distance online relationship.)

As others have said, anybody, men and women alike, should be able to walk down the high street with nothing on and not be molested.

You have rights over your own body – or should do, at least – and what you choose to do with it is your business, provided you are not harming others (and “offence”, whatever that means, is not, to me, harming anybody).

Like I said, I weigh more than I should, and for health reasons, I should probably lose 10 – 20 pounds, but that doesn’t stop me from going about the house naked.

The fact is, doing something like this that goes against most of the traditions we were brought up with can force you to think more deeply about social conventions and why we do what we do, or think what we think – and you’ll often find that there is no good reason for it, and even if there once was, it may no longer be of any significance these days.

Besides which, nudity is more of a state of mind, as this quote by the celebrated dancer Josephine Baker reveals: “I wasn’t really naked. I simply didn’t have any clothes on.”

Conclusion

My intention in writing this is not, of course, to offend anybody – because I don’t see any reason why the human body should be offensive at all, and I’m not really even sure what being offended is. (If I were to be offended by anything at all, it would be things like injustice and greed and a lack of caring for others, but it’s certainly not about what people wear, or don’t wear, or whether they swear or not).

What I do hope, by sharing something personal that many people might prefer to keep quiet (because nudity, or even a desire to go without clothes, can be seen as being a perversion for some reason), is that others might become confident to give it a try.

All you need to do is to have confidence (e.g. in your own body), which I know can be a challenge for some people, and to exercise caution (e.g. where you practise this, being sure you’ve not overlooked by people who may object, safety) – and go for it, because if it’s what you want to do, that’s all that matters.

Humans have become adept at judging others because of their shape or weight, but it’s no business of anybody else at all.

And the fact is, there are other benefits to nudity, including:

• Better Sex. If you are used to only having sex with the lights out, then think how much better it can be when you no longer care about how you (or your partner) look, and can feel comfortable making love with the lights on, where you are able to see your partner’s face and expressions, for example.
• Cost. If you wear clothes less often, you won’t need to buy or wash them as often.
• Facing Fear. Going naked forces you to confront your fear and feelings of vulnerability, which strengthens your character. (Writing this article could be construed as me making myself vulnerable, for example.)
• Health. As I mentioned above, greater exposure to sunlight, via vitamin D, can give your immune system a boost.
• Skin. When you wear clothes and sweat, it can cause rashes and inflammation, which is an issue you won’t have if you’re naked.
• Toilet. This may sound like a weird one, but going to the toilet is so much easier when you can just sit down, without having to fool around with clothes.

There are even those who claim that being naked helps you burn more fat.

So, it’s time to normalize nudity and focus on the person inside, not the container.

For example, the actress Tracee Ellis Ross admits to walking around the house and cooking without any clothes on.

And as the drag artist RuPaul says, we are born naked, and everything else is drag.

Let me leave you with one final perspective: